tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.comments2013-12-28T01:27:07.992-06:00forget regret, or life is yours to missNora the Explorerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17762502640914533986noreply@blogger.comBlogger89125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-57033055811406051442013-12-28T01:27:07.992-06:002013-12-28T01:27:07.992-06:00Pretty sure I never read this when you first poste...Pretty sure I never read this when you first posted it. I don't really have any magic helpful words here either, but I just wanted to offer *hugs*. You are pretty dang awesome, and I'm glad you are my friend. :)Annahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13955580642509079804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-36238185041930907272013-12-28T00:14:22.310-06:002013-12-28T00:14:22.310-06:00*hugs* I don't really have any helpful words t...*hugs* I don't really have any helpful words to say right now, but just wanted you to know that I read this (and would certainly be willing to read more!) and I care. And I can relate to so much of it. You describe it all so well. Keep writing, you're good at it. ^_^Annahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13955580642509079804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-87970428179664251432013-08-07T01:48:03.980-05:002013-08-07T01:48:03.980-05:00It is hard, but we have to remember that God does ...It is hard, but we have to remember that God does things in His own time. Maybe there is something planned for your future, and healing needs to come later....or maybe this is the good bit, and without you realising He has already taken the worst of the pain, and has left you with just what He feels you can cope with right now. Who knows? I will pray for you Angel =)Kristihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03896212136886959877noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-980637337745216972013-04-09T20:42:25.636-05:002013-04-09T20:42:25.636-05:00KITTY!!!KITTY!!!Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-91476077219648700432013-02-08T00:16:04.450-06:002013-02-08T00:16:04.450-06:00I didn't mean to wait so long to reply to you ...I didn't mean to wait so long to reply to you guys, but I wanted to put something together.<br /><br />Steph, you clearly know me well using both Rafiki AND Scrubs in the same post. *grin*. Well played, my friend, well played. It's just hard to believe my heart will get there again, you know? Oye. It's just scary to think of how much power I could possibly have and I could possibly accidentally hurt someone because I don't think that all the people who hurt me in the faith had the intention of hurting me, 'ya know?<br /><br />Grace, it makes sense. That was also Fall 2009 where a bunch of crap hit the fan all at once. I'm kind of in the same 'sit back and let God work, evne if I can't see it right ow' thing, because I want to do things MY way! I'm stubborn, 'ya know? Doesn't matter if my way isn't right and god's ways are better. I want MY way! ;)Norahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08694563182324224087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-7869129243843227792013-02-01T16:20:49.397-06:002013-02-01T16:20:49.397-06:00I can relate to so much of this.
I wonder if you...I can relate to so much of this. <br /><br />I wonder if your week at IHOP was perhaps kind of the straw that broke the camel's back - that it wasn't so much that week itself that shattered your faith, but that on top of your other experiences where you've been hurt by the church? Please don't think I'm trying to minimize the damage that week did - I fully believe it was damaging and what happened there was not of God! I'm just thinking that, on top of everything else you've experienced, it makes sense that IHOP broke you the way it did, despite the fact that it was only a short amount of time.<br /><br />What you said about how several years ago, you'd turn to God in difficult situations...oh man, me too. Back in middle and high school, the tougher things got, the more I depended on God. But now? I run away from Him and hide in stories and distractions instead. I don't know how to change that. I'm not sure how to get myself to a place of depending on God again. Maybe it's something He has to do in me, rather than me having to try harder. I know He's still there and still working in my life, even if I can't see it right now. I always seem to want to rush things, but God's timing is slower...I think because He knows that it'll take me a while to catch on, it'll take a while for it to really sink in. I guess I've come to a point where, in some ways, I'm tired of trying, and I think in this case, that's a good thing. I think right now what I need is to sit back and let God work, even if I can't see it right now. Anyway. Kinda went on a tangent there. Sorry.<br /><br />I'm totally with you on being terrified of making a mistake and hurting somebody. I think that's part of the reason I keep subconsciously sabotaging myself when it comes to school stuff. I don't feel like I'm ready to be out there actually working with people, especially people who have already been hurt. What if, instead of helping them, I hurt them worse? One thing that helps me sometimes is the thought that maybe because I am so afraid of hurting people, I will be extra careful to make sure that doesn't happen. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-58623834570484220002013-01-31T11:54:25.238-06:002013-01-31T11:54:25.238-06:00P.S. The only way you would be a bad Christian is ...P.S. The only way you would be a bad Christian is if you started thinking like the Westboro Baptist Church, Mercy Ministries, IHOP, or any other radical, extremist "Christian" organizations. I don't know anything about IHOP, but the fact that you escaped at all says you're nothing like them and you won't let them take away anyone else's faith again. It may have shattered your faith, but you're working to put the pieces back together, not leaving all the pieces scattered for someone to cut themselves on (I'm a huge fan of metaphors :) ). That makes you a good Christian.Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-49370174534669375022013-01-31T11:40:03.962-06:002013-01-31T11:40:03.962-06:00Wow. Okay. Let's see if I can address everythi...Wow. Okay. Let's see if I can address everything without going over the character limit.<br /><br />First of all, please don't give in to self-injury again. I think I can understand what it means for you based on how you explained the temporary relief it provides (I nearly succumbed to self-injury in high school, myself, so maybe that helps the understanding, too). It's tempting, SO TEMPTING, to lapse back into that practice. I get it. But you'll only hate yourself more after doing so, because then there goes everything you accomplished since you stopped in the first place. And then you'll have to start over from scratch, and it will be a billion times harder to get back to the point you're at today. Don't give in!!!<br /><br />I get that it doesn't seem like you've accomplished anything at all. I get that it seems you're sinking further and further down the hole. But from what I've learned about you since we first started talking, I can tell you've made a TON of progress and are climbing the ladder to get out of it. It's slow, sometimes you get set back a few rungs, but you've persevered and continued. Right now, you seem kind of stuck, like you're not sure you're climbing the correct ladder. Great thing about ladders, though: There are only two directions to go, and well, you know what's waiting when you go down. All you're left with is up, and no matter what ladder you're on, they'll all lead up and out of the hole. You're making progress. :)<br /><br />As for being afraid of making mistakes... It's NORMAL to be afraid. I would think you're crazy if you WEREN'T afraid! Dr. Cox told JD that being afraid makes him a better doctor. Being afraid makes you a better person, more aware of the souls, troubled or not, around you. But you're going to make mistakes. You have made mistakes already. And that's OKAY, too! Remember our friend, Rafiki: Mistakes are part of the past, but the best thing to do is learn from them rather than dwell upon them. You gain wisdom from mistakes to pass on to others so they don't make the same ones. Think of it as you're trying to find your way out of a forest. You'll eventually find your way out, but when it's time to lead others out of the forest, you'll know a better, much faster route with fewer obstacles and road blocks. Maybe right now you need to reach out to someone who has found their way out, and take their path for a while. It's okay to ask for help, especially from people who have been down that road before.<br /><br />As for hurting other people... I believe your life experiences, the good, the bad, and the ugly, will only help you guide people who are going through the same shit you did/are, not hurt them or shatter their faiths. They'll be able to relate to you, and for someone who feels completely alone in their feelings, that could mean everything to them, that one thing that stops them from succumbing to worse than self-injury.<br /><br />I'm sure it doesn't feel like you've made progress, and I wish I could snap my fingers and make you believe it. But belief cannot be forced. That has to come from your heart, and I promise your heart will get there again. It gets better.<br /><br />Sorry I rambled for so long. :)Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-65600727250263157682013-01-02T11:15:58.725-06:002013-01-02T11:15:58.725-06:00It has definitely been an interesting year. I'...It has definitely been an interesting year. I'm glad to hear that it has been three years since you last cut. Praise God!<br /><br />I'm also glad that you and I have been able to mend our friendship and be able to interact again. That is truly something only God could do.<br /><br />I wish you the best going forward with all the struggles and troubles that come your way. Remember... God is on your side.<br /><br />Your Friend,<br />CJCJ Luckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03882611126887519607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-50005503259665956382012-12-16T23:24:29.581-06:002012-12-16T23:24:29.581-06:00AMEN to all of this. Love it. Not many words from ...AMEN to all of this. Love it. Not many words from me tonight, but I agree.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-32173427332934872762012-12-12T00:46:05.392-06:002012-12-12T00:46:05.392-06:00So, I'm avoiding doing homework, so I decided ...So, I'm avoiding doing homework, so I decided to come write a comment on your blog. Because I read this, and I wanted to comment, and then I forgot, and now I remembered.<br /><br />I can relate so much. So so much. Especially the last two paragraphs. I actually really don't know what to say beyond that. I kind of suck with words tonight.<br /><br />But I do know this: you are not a failure as a person, even if you feel like one sometimes. And you are one of my best friends, and I am so glad we are roommates. *hugs*Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-48486734467949494612012-11-27T12:41:30.613-06:002012-11-27T12:41:30.613-06:00I'm glad you are recovering well, friend.I'm glad you are recovering well, friend. CJ Luckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03882611126887519607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-76773738199948608892012-11-27T09:56:20.478-06:002012-11-27T09:56:20.478-06:00It is amazing what a little tiny organ can do to a...It is amazing what a little tiny organ can do to a person. I'm glad you are starting to recover. <3Calicoskieshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15075396105450643737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-83986757847766512832012-08-29T21:20:39.781-05:002012-08-29T21:20:39.781-05:00Abortions due to rape/incest/life of the mother on...Abortions due to rape/incest/life of the mother only constitute 1% of abortions performed in this country. You should check out http://secularprolife.org - lots of good info there.<br /><br />Regarding rape - an innocent child shouldn't be executed because of the crimes of its biological father. It's an issue of justice. see http://www.rebeccakiessling.com for the story of a woman who was conceived in rape, and would have been aborted by her mother if abortion would have been legal at that time. She and her mother, today, are profoundly grateful that she's alive. <br /><br />I absolutely agree with you that unjust discrimination against homosexual people should be avoided at all costs (workplace discrimination, etc.).JoAnna Wahlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09942928659520676271noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-67388140675423508072012-08-29T20:48:34.203-05:002012-08-29T20:48:34.203-05:00I struggle with abortion when it comes to rape is ...I struggle with abortion when it comes to rape is where I trip up. Yes, the child is an innocent victim, but at the same time, the woman was a victim too. I personally do not agree with it in all circumstances and -personally- do not feel it should be a free-for-all, but it's one of those areas where I really, really struggle. I do agree that the child is innocent and while I would 100% prefer that adoption would be the path a woman chose if she was raped, I find it rather difficult to have someone carry it to term. I don't think that someone should be able to get an abortion just because they "feel like it" (which I believe is actually a small minority of abortions), but that there should be legitimate reasons for it.<br /><br />I would even be fine finding some sort of place that would allow both parties equal rights, for example civil union vs marriage, or not permitting homosexuals to be married in a church (while it's not my personal ideal, I understand that not everyone's religious believes jive perfectly with mine, and that is fine). I think this is one of those circumstances where it might be a game of give-and-take. While marriage may not be an unalienable right, there are other ones that I think that should be: regardless or sexual orientation. Such as the right to not be discriminated against in the workplace. I read story after story of homosexual teenagers killing themselves because of bullying and while that is a case of a bigger issuer at hand, it does show that SOMETHING needs to be done to save, to protect young lives. Nora the Explorerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17762502640914533986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-363399524739893232012-08-29T20:36:40.392-05:002012-08-29T20:36:40.392-05:00Regarding abortion... " It is not my place to...Regarding abortion... " It is not my place to decide what someone else does with their body." <br /><br />But it's not what someone is doing with their body. It's what they are doing to an innocent child -- a child who has his or her own distinct, genetically unique body. This is an issue of <a href="http://secularprolife.org" rel="nofollow">human rights</a>. You claim to be for equality yet you think people should be able to deny the right to life to unborn children. That seems like a puzzling contradiction to me.<br /><br />Regarding "equality" - I too believe in equality for all. But marriage isn't a right, and there's a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom_versus_license" rel="nofollow">difference between freedom and license</a>. We need a license to drive a car, start a business, or engage in marriage." Moreover, there are many <a href="http://www.spiked-online.com/site/article/12434/" rel="nofollow">secular reasons to oppose gay marriage</a>. It's not about hating gay people or whatever, it's about not wanting to redefine a societal institution that is integral to the fabric of our society, and render it even more meaningless than it already is. <br /><br />Finally, loving someone sometimes means not approving of their behavior. I can love an adulterer without approving of adultery. Just the same, I can love an actively homosexual person without approving of their lifestyle.JoAnna Wahlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09942928659520676271noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-38058548140778749572012-08-29T20:20:56.211-05:002012-08-29T20:20:56.211-05:00YES!!! Thank you!!!YES!!! Thank you!!!Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-62444064167231733812012-08-29T20:18:55.603-05:002012-08-29T20:18:55.603-05:00This comment has been removed by the author.Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-56497206451950501142012-08-16T11:15:15.302-05:002012-08-16T11:15:15.302-05:00Change scares the shit out of me. No joke. But wit...Change scares the shit out of me. No joke. But without change, we get nowhere in life. I'm terrified of applying for a job, because I'm worried I won't find anything, or that I won't get one because I'll screw up at the interview. But what is motivating me to look for one anyway is that I'm sick of living at home. I want to get a car, move out, and start my future. It's always that first step towards change that makes everything a billion times scarier. But after that first step, the second step comes more easily, and the third even more easily, and so on. If you're tired of being stuck in one place, take that first step! It's okay to be scared! But the reward is worth everything you can ever hope for.Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-91608241444239706482012-05-31T15:56:27.296-05:002012-05-31T15:56:27.296-05:00Sorry, I juuuuuuuuust now saw this reply. Failsauc...Sorry, I juuuuuuuuust now saw this reply. Failsauce. That would be wonderful to get together with you and Becca! =)Nora the Explorerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17762502640914533986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-51109525322761874912012-05-21T21:33:14.861-05:002012-05-21T21:33:14.861-05:00Holy crap Nora!
I had no idea you struggled with ...Holy crap Nora!<br /><br />I had no idea you struggled with eating and PTSD. I'll be sure to pray for you!<br /><br />And we should plan to hang out sometime soon! Due to both of our transportation limitations, it seems wise that we involve a third party. lol I have a friend named Becca, she is a great person, sound in the faith and she's my mentor-ish friend! We should plan to get together sometime soon!someone notjewishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08896002475419040988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-58234725748008578972012-05-13T18:47:55.011-05:002012-05-13T18:47:55.011-05:00Sounds like what I was going through before surger...Sounds like what I was going through before surgery. I wanted so badly to be healed, but that meant going into the unknown, away from what I'd known for 10 years. I hated being in pain and having the rib hump but I didn't understand life without it. Plus there were the old memories that scoliosis drew up that made me hate myself more, for not doing anything about it sooner (I truly felt embarrassed at the consultation appointment, telling the doctor I waited 10 years), and for letting other stupid things get to me.<br /><br />Yeah, it's pretty scary, not knowing what the other side looks like. Even though you know it's better than the side you're on, it's still intimidating as all hell. You just have to find a way to commit to going forth with it, and getting the little voice in your head to shut up long enough to let you move forward with healing. (I was silently yelling at the little voice in my head to shut up right up until they wheeled me to the OR. And then I was knocked out before the little voice had a chance to start up again. ^_^) <br /><br />Hang tough, my friend! You can do it, I know you can!Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-18445461387544808302012-05-10T00:07:28.382-05:002012-05-10T00:07:28.382-05:00Hee hee. "I haz a tall." xDHee hee. "I haz a tall." xDStephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-9602163792295113972012-04-27T21:31:26.446-05:002012-04-27T21:31:26.446-05:00So, remember on October 21, 2011, you were all &qu...So, remember on October 21, 2011, you were all "It's been six years and I should be over this now," and I said "You'll get there on your own terms, you'll knock down those walls when you're ready" and all that stuff?<br /><br />You're there, my friend. Keep going, and don't look back! (And bring the sledgehammer.) :)Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7194453176302149894.post-36260519548593679612012-04-11T12:28:53.798-05:002012-04-11T12:28:53.798-05:00FLOPPY DISKS FOR THE WIN!
I just had a flashback ...FLOPPY DISKS FOR THE WIN!<br /><br />I just had a flashback to Elementary school. I'm pretty sure we used those for the library computers. For what, I don't remember, but we used them. WOW. GO 90's!Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01625699901324025892noreply@blogger.com