Lessons Learned Fall '10

1. Windows sucks. Hardcore. It should die a painful, fiery death. Mac and Linux FTW. Apple iPod FTW. Windows FTD (For The Death).
2. Coffee is a friend of mine (I've a friend in coffee).
3. Video games, anime, and manga are the best stress reliever ever.
4. Novel concept: Talk to your professors when a relative dies, you get sick, or you just have the Semester from Hell. Imagine that: they tend to work with you! WOW!
5. Nutella cookies are a flop. They burn. Epically.
6. I have the most amazing friends. They play Smash Brothers with me, they watch anime with me, they put up with my mindless rambling. They make me gluten free care packages, and listen to me whine.
7. When will I learn: never tell God never? Let's recap, Angelique. You told him you'd never move anywhere cold. Check. You're in MINNE FREEZING SOTA. You told him you'd never go to a Christian college. Check. You're at a pretty conserative one at that and considering almost a "flaming evil liberal." And you told him you'd never go into the ministry. HA. Now you're double majoring in youth min and psychology. Learn this, Angelique, never tell God never. Got it? Good.
8. It's easy to love those who are nice to you. It's difficult, yet more rewarding, to love the unlovable.
9. Life is short and time is sweet. Don't put off telling the ones you love that you are there. And that you care.
10. "For when I am weak, then He is strong."

Rather Serious

I feel weird posting a serious blog entry after two very lighthearted ones, but sometimes it's what we need to do. But Christmas is just two days away, and it's a time of pain, of sadness, of grief. Of remembering what I've lost, and what I'll never have again.

I remember it was Christmas the first time I dropped the F-bomb. My brother made my stuffed animal flip me off, and my response? "Don't F*** me!". Yeah. Mom never did find out about that car ride with Dad and J2. I remember Grandpa teasing me about this, that, and the other thing. Christmas 2005 was the last Christmas I had with him. He always made sure to look out for me. I certainly wasn't his favorite, but he always did keep an eye on me. =)

I miss fudge, buckeyes, carmeals, and peanut brittle. I miss chocolate covered raisins. I miss getting clothes in sizes way too big and putting them away for a couple, oh, years (or forever... i still haven't grown into some of my Christmas presents from years ago!). I miss so much, and I feel like so much was robbed.

But I also miss Christmas Eve with my father. Sure, the guy is an asshat buttface, but Christmas was the one time we got along. It was the one time of year we'd buy a shrimp ring and eat it. And watch cheesy Christmas movies. And it was GREAT. Just GREAT.

But above all, I miss candlight Christmas eve services. I miss holding the candle, and getting burned by the wax. I miss my soprano voice singing the words to the Christmas hymn: "All is calm, all is bright."

Because here I am. Away from my family. I won't see them this year. I likely won't see them ever again. And it hurts. It hurts like hell. I'm emotionally orphaned, even if my parents are still physically alive. I don't see them, and it hurts. It hurts it hurts it hurts. How can I sing "All is calm, all is bright" when there's a darkness, the darkness that having an absent family leaves, is rampant in my soul? How can I sing about "peace on Earth, good will to men" when I can't find peace in my own heart?

It's Christmas. Not a time for angst. And I do my best to roll with the punches, and be as joyful as I can (for joy and happiness are two different things, but that's another serious, way down the road blog entry). But for now... I think this Christmas hymn sums up my feelings this year quite well. No wonder it's long been a favorite.

O Come, O Come Emmanuel
And ransom captive Israel
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan's tyranny
From depths of Hell Thy people save
And give them victory o'er the grave
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Day-Spring, come and cheer
Our spirits by Thine advent here
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night
And death's dark shadows put to flight.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

Emmanuel. He's the one who will ransom my cold, empty heart this year. He's the one who will restore hope. And as He comes, as an innocent child, he, too, will bring light into my world again.

Angelique's Food Adventures

It seems that I have an incredible amount of fail when it comes to making things.

There was the Pasta Incident of 2009. In which public safety declared my pasta a self defense weapon and I had to actually go running for them to prevent the smoke detector from going off.

Then there was the Exploding Tuna Casserole in the Microwave Incident. In which tuna casserole wound up on the roof of the Arden microwave. And all over the room.

There was the Ramen Incident of 2010 in which ramen noodles singlehandedly murdered my lovely rocky road cookie bars.

Then there was the Exploding Hot Chocolate Incident where I learned not to put the powder in with the milk in the microwave.

And then there was the Nutella Cookie incident, which is too vile to give the details of. Needless to say, I've never seen cookies fried that badly.

On the bright side, I make great chicken.

In which my life is never boring

During homecoming, I turned to one of my closest friends, Anna, and told her "Anna, my life is never boring." Right after I get out of the car, my friend Sam's friend Dan whom I've never met but is my Facebook friend, walks up to me and says hi. Well, hi, friend of a friend whom I've never met!

I once managed to blow up tuna casserole in the microwave. Don't ask, because I don't know how either.

I once melted a pasta strainer and assaulted rocky road cookies with Ramen Noodles.

I get asked all the time where I'm from. My favorite guesses are South Africa and New York mixed with British. So apparently I'm a British Newyorker? Sweet.

When with a group of friends, I somehow accidentally wound up at a Gay Pride festival.

All this to say, I don't live a boring life. I have this life where things that don't happen to anyone just happen to me. And my most recent story is truly one that could only happen to me.

I am obsessed with a certain anime, and so there's a reason that I always wore my black and white bracelet on my left wrist, to match the character.

Anyhow, it's the last chapel of Fall 2010. Well, the last legit chapel. All that was left was praise chapel (which I hate as it gives me panic attacks) and the children's christmas program (seriously, cutest chapel ever). Jim Johnson, the campus pastor dude, comes up on stage and gives his message. Which is flipping epic, like always.

Well. Due to my crutches and the fact I leave early to chapel, I sit towards the back. I was sitting behind the manager. We were to write out on our papers what we were giving to Jesus in 2011. I wrote all this lovely, profound stuff. It was a good, worshipful moment. And then. Then. What happens?

I take my crutch to stand up, and unbeknowst to me it catches on my bracelet. FAIL. I don't see this happening, so I stand up. Crutch + bracelet = beads fly ever. Random students get pelted with black and white beads. I think a few flew into the manager. There we are. Worship song playing. People all calm and respectful and YAY JESUS in the quiet way. And me? I quickly make my escape as I'm struggling not to burst out laughing. As are the people around me.

So yes, people. What did I give Jesus for 2011? Black and white beads.