10.3.11

whispering hope.

I don't talk about my faith often. I don't want to be flamboyant about it, because my views don't mess with the traditional Conservative Christian. I do believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the Living God. I believe in the Apostle's Creed.

I don't mesh in with the traditional church though, it seems. I don't *gasp* really care for Chris Tomlin or Hillsong. I think those words right there are fighting words that shun me from many communities. I believe that God gave me my disabilities for a reason, and why I may wish and pray for them to get better, if He doesn't choose to heal them it doesn't make me a bad Christian or him any less God. Sometimes God can and will choose to heal, but it's not always within His divine plan. I may not understand it, and I may even want to cuss him out for choosing this path with me, but it's what I have and it's what I live with.

I like anime, manga, RENT, and Wicked. My clothes are not always perfectly modest (not that I look like I just walked out of a catalog for Slutz R Us but I digress) I struggle with emotional challenges, but that doesn't make Him any less God either. And no, my depression and everything else will NOT get better if I just surrender it to God. Anyone who thinks that is frankly a great fool. I believe that women have equal rights to men. I don't believe that God doesn't give us more than we can handle - for I know that I can't handle a lot of the things I am going through.

And sometimes I doubt God, which many cast the Judgey McJudge eye on me. But David doubted God. Many of the Bible Greats went through dry spells.

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